It happens every year – I’m making my lists, checking them twice and trying to get things crossed off before too many more things get added. I’m making progress and feeling in control. And then it happens. I hit the wall. I find my Xmas edge by teetering over it and doing the arm circling thing to keep from falling head-first. This time I was told that the thing I had found for my mother-in-law, that I’d gone to the mall for the 2nd time in one morning to get (during work no less) was not the right thing. And I threw in the towel. I didn’t freak out, I just made it clear that I wasn’t offering to take care of plan b.

And really I’ve been doing this all along in small steps and it’s been one of my healthier Decembers. Deciding, no I have enough for that person, they don’t need that extra dumb thing that is going to require a special trip across town. And no i don’t need to cook that thing from scratch, there’s enough ‘Martha-ing’ going on and what am I trying to prove anyways?

I guess it’s about actively playing my Christmas edge. It’s about being balanced enough to know when it’s time to stop instead of giving into Xmas cynicism which just sucks my energy. It’s about finding the best in the season in all its nooks and crannies. It’s about focusing on the relationships and not just the ‘stuff’ of Christmas. It’s about making sure I have enough time (and sleep!) to get to my mat and the sanity to enjoy it. Here’s to a healthy holiday.