I’m visiting my long-time friend in LA and we’re driving back to her house from somewhere. She’s an expressive passionate woman with a South African accent. (Yes, you have to imagine how she sounds, that’s your job, young reader).

She says, “See that guy waiting for his dog to pee?”
“Yes”, I say
“He’s one of the creators of The Big Race”
Let’s just say my friend’s TV only shows the news and Bill Moyers interviews on PBS
“Amazing Race?” I ask.
“Yes! And you know what?”
“What?” I ask conspiratorially.
He TALKS TO HIS DOG IN BABY TALK”, she says with disgust.
But ever the friendly neighbour she slows down when she passes him so she can wave and say “Hellooooo!”

Thanks to my friend I don’t have to worry about getting an unrealistic view of The Business, I will only see the seething underbelly – people who talk baby talk to their dogs.