I’m on day 5 of detoxing with the Wild Rose kit for the first time in two years.  It’s been a while thanks to being busy growing, having and nursing a baby.  Leo’s nine months now.  He can hold his own bottle, say “Mama” at 3:00 a.m. and meanwhile I’m eating a lot of brown rice.

My latest detox news is that I finally self-published a cookbook of recipes that I’ve posted here on my blog as well as new ones.  I’ve been referring to it a lot and am glad to have it in a handy readable format (you can too for the low low price of $4.95, at wildrosecookbook.com - ok that’s it for the plug).  

The crazy thing is that I’m enjoying detoxing so much more than i have before.  Previously, doing a detox was pretty much like being in food purgatory, which is why i started developing and posting recipes in the first place.  If i can keep anyone from what-the-heck-am-i-going-to-eat hell then I’m a happy camper. 

I’m trying some new food this time around.  I figured out a roasted garlic salad dressing that isn’t too bad.  It’s tough to get the right flavouring though when you can’t use stuff like balsamic vinegar, worscheshire sauce, the things that add the depth to the flavour.  I’m still working on it.

I also bought a bunch of kale because I know it’s ridiculously good for you and if Alannis can love kale then dammit so can I.   It’s still sitting in the fridge.

Detoxing is different his time around. Instead of feeling deprived I’m feeling like I’m really taking care of myself with food.  Like all this brown rice is nurturing for me instead of boring me to tears. 

Last evening there was a time somewhere around Angus the five-year old’s second time out that I would have given my left arm for a glass of wine.  But then after the kids were asleep I really grooved on the herbal tea I had while HoneyBunny and I watched a movie.   I’m not sure I’d watched a craving pass with that much clarity before.   I need to try that more often.

And maybe it’s because I’m having a tough time losing the last few pounds after having a baby that my perspective is different.  The pounds slid off after my first pregnancy, but not so much this time around.  And I seem to have even less grace period with the ol’ bod than i did before.  Before I could mess around for a weekend and get back on the wagon before anything dire happened.  On Easter weekend, i should have just schmeared the chocolate and cupcakes on my body in a cellulite pattern rather than bother eating it. 

But I don’t bother feeling bummed out about it.  I’m being a realist.  I pulled out my summer clothes and the bottom line is, if I don’t do something I’ll be wearing a barrel when the weather is warm.  Because I’m sure not buying a new wardrobe in another size.

And it’s made me think about what people are willing to do for their health and their weight and all that.  I have a friend who gets in the habit of not eating all day and sitting at her desk and then she’s brain dead by 3:00 and eats all evening to make up.  So she’s trying to bring food to snack on at work and get out at lunch even if it’s just for 10 minutes to clear her head.  Not hard right?  That’s all good stuff and she’ll probably feel better in lots of ways.

Then I have another friend who’s gone through menopause and it’s supposed to be a major pain trying to lose weight at that stage of life.  She looks awesome to me but she says she’s got a few extra pounds that are driving her nuts.  She’s read the menopause books and is basically living on veggies and protein and fruit.  Her lovely husband has even been making homemade bread and she hasn’t been having any.  How is that humanly possible?  But her comment is, “I really hate being heavy”.  So wow, it makes me ask myself – what are you willing to do to get what you want?

My friend’s Dad weighs around 300 pounds and he made the herculean effort of losing a bunch weight a while back.  Now he loves food and obviously didn’t eat as much of it but he learned to also love that he was more mobile and his joints bugged him less and he was more comfortable.  All that started to become as important as food.   

Because the funny thing about food is that we can’t be all or nothing about it.  We gotta eat to live.  But the good news is that we have 3 meals a day to get it right.  And to manage our cravings and get in lots of fruits and veggies.  And to detox every once in a while to remind ourselves that we don’t need processed foods to be happy.  And that fitting into our jeans and being able to breath while doing it is pretty important to us too.

And with all that in mind, I’m off to my date with a bunch of kale.