There are plenty of things we believe we *should* do and we don’t for one reason or another. We want to be healthier or at least less unhealthy but it takes a lot of energy to stop a bad habit. It takes even more to propel ourselves out of a rut. And sometimes it just doesn’t seem much fun to do the thing we *should* do.

I ran on a new trail the other day and told a friend about it. So she tried it and then got really concerned with how *far* it went. She wanted to figure out the distance she’d run because she’s anal about tracking that kind of thing. I told her that I don’t really care about the distance, I run with the time I have and let the distance take care of itself. She said ‘oh that’s so yoga!’, and said it like she was accusing me of being a slacker (which i’m ok with).

But I used to be obsessed about that stuff and it took *all* the fun out of running. It was like if I wasn’t going to go x km’s it just wasn’t going to be good enough and then yeesh why bother because it’s just going to feel like a huge chore. When what I *really* care about is getting outside in the fresh air and feeling my legs moving and getting the glorious endorphin hit. And none of those benefits are tied to the distance at all. I only need to get my ass outside to experience them.

So by refocusing on the benefits, the stuff I love, I re-oriented myself on the running front. I shut-down the cranky parent that lives in my brain wagging a finger at me about what I *should* do. It allowed the fun back in. Now the key to this kind of re-orientation is knowing what the pay-off is in a real experiential sort of way. It has to be more than, ‘gee i *should* eat more veggies because they’re good for me. Instead you find a great salad bowl, amazing dressing and throw stuff in that you love and before you know it you look forward to salad night. Eating salad becomes a good experience and it’s got nothing to do with your vitamin A intake or whatever made you think you *should* eat it more.

The other key, I think, to not ’shoulding’ on yourself is to cut yourself a break when you really don’t feel like it. Going back to salad - I have learned to love it, but you know if it’s wet and rainy outside and I really want warm comfort food? No contest, the salad waits. I do what I can to avoid it being a chore. It’s about keeping the cranky parent out of it, period. Next - learning how to floss my teeth regularly…..