Some days HoneyBunny is such a better parent than I am.  And that’s OK.  Hopefully between the two of us Angus will grow up only slightly damaged by slack parentage. 

The other night our child did not want to go to sleep.  And we’re spoiled because that’s usually not a problem.  Usually our challenge is more around avoiding the destruction of our house by the Tasmanian Devil. 

We both took a turn trying to settle him down.  I tried to work my calming yoga mojo on him.  I stroked his temple.  I talked to him in my Savasana voice.  I felt like I had him.  Then just as I was about to walk away he jumped up on the bed and starting bouncing on it.  Yup, he was the picture of relaxation.  My yoga mojo is some powerful shit.

So we let him go for a few minutes and then he got really upset with unconsolable crying.

So it was HB’s turn and he went and and I couldn’t hear what was going on, but a few minutes later he came back and Angus was quiet.  And stayed that way.  I said - what the heck did you do??  He says it’s something I told him about, but I don’t remember anything about it.  I’m glad somebody did.

He calmly said, ”Angus, you don’t have to be this upset.  You just don’t. You’re cozy in your Big Red Bed.  You’re surrounded by your friends.  Look, you have Puppy (and Puppy barked).  You have Frog (who gave him a kiss). And you have Mitch Monkey (also a kissy guy).  You have your friend Yellow Blankie.  Look how he likes to snuggle with you.  You don’t have to be this upset.  You’re OK.  Mom and Dad love you.  You can go to sleep now.”

And he did.

You can imagine how scary it must be to feel a force of emotions when you’re three.  Heck, it’s scary when you’re an adult.  Which is why we usually ignore our feelings any day than give them a few minutes of stage time in our lives.

If you’re anything like me you start catastrophizing - how will I do whatever upcoming task when I feel so crappy?  I make it even worse by assuming I’ll feel this way forever and making grandious assumptions that this one emotion will cripple me and cause my life to end up in the trash can.

But I *know* that it’s better to give the feelings some stage time and I *know* that once I give them their due they’ll pass.  Or at least I know it logically, now I just need to know it in the heat of the emotional moment too.

So next time I feel some heavy duty feelings I’m going to use HB’s technique.  I don’t have to feel overwhelmed by it.  I’m surrounded by people I love and comforts I cherish.  I just need to relax.  Feel it.  Let it go.  And then sleep.